8 Ingenious Things to Do If You Have a Stubborn Child. “Too stubborn to forget, too proud to apologize” this quote fits right onto the kids, which can be a pain to handle for adults. Handling a stubborn child requires patience and understanding, and if one fails to have that knowledge, it can really spoil the child further.
Dealing with such children seems like a daily challenge for parents, and every little thing adds up to a new struggle every day if you do not know the right strategy to tackle them. Adults try various methods in desperation to deal with the child’s stubbornness – sometimes they work, and sometimes they don’t.
You do not need to worry; we are here with some ingenious things that work if you have a stubborn child.
To begin with, no child is born stubborn, right? We, “the Adults,” are responsible if kids become obstinate while growing up! But before taking any actions, it is vital to decide whether or not their behavior can be named “Stubbornness.” For this, you really need to focus on and comprehend your child’s behavior pattern.
Now, you must be thinking you are doing and have been doing everything that you could, not to make them but, guess what? That’s exactly how they act.
As stated earlier, we are here to help you decide how to deal with their stubbornness without pulling out your hair in frustration. 😱
- Give them Options
The best solution to manage your child’s stubborn behavior is by diverting their attention – Options and not directives. It can be helpful in a situation when all you hear is a loud “No” in response to your questions. “Give them directions, not orders.” Don’t try to direct your kid while he’s stubborn. It is most likely to backfire, and as a result, you’ll now have to deal with a louder chatter of “No,” “I don’t want to,” and so on.
Stubborn kids have their own mindset when it comes to listening. You cannot force a five-year-old child to stop crying or to stop making a mess on the floor. Similarly, a 10-year-old kid can’t understand why he is eligible to help you with the home’s responsibilities. For instance, you can get some parenting tips to motivate your children to complete their responsibilities around the home.
- Engage them with free time fun skills
Another great trick that works like wonders is not to let your kids sit free. Yes, you heard it right! An idle kid craves trouble, which adds up to a new struggle to your hectic day, which we do not want, right? The key is to manage your child’s free time – do not allow the curious cat in your kid to be free. Challenging games and toys usually attract stubborn kids. Think of games that have a challenging impact and bring toys that interest your child’s curious nature. For illustration, see how many blocks your adamant four-year-old can collect and put back in the bag in, say, five minutes.
You can engage your twelve-year-old kids by teaching them martial arts skills and training them to protect themselves when needed. Utilize your child’s stubbornness positively; you can gift a unique yet effective training tool like a collapsible pocket staff, which is super portable. It is mainly used for martial arts training and self-defense training. Grab one for yourself and ensure your child’s safety now!
- A little reward won’t hurt
You may have heard this phrase, “If you don’t show appreciation to those that deserve it, they’ll learn to stop doing the things you appreciate,” – Unknown, this fits perfectly for any age group, Be it your strong-willed child or a mature adult. Small encouraging phrases like “You did great,” or “You figured out a way to make it work,” can brighten up somebody’s mood to a great extent. Little appreciating words can change your unyielding child in ways that you can’t even imagine.
Bribe your stubborn kid with little rewards, kids respond to rewards well, and it will motivate them to continue their good behavior. You do not need to be fancy in rewards; a pat on the back or a high five will do the deed. The key is to smile and appreciate, and here you go with a big grin on your crying and screaming child! (Yep! That simple.)
- Communication is the key
Strong-willed or stubborn children are often highly sensitive to how you treat them, and lack of communication will only worsen their behavior. So often, parents choose to dictate their children without actually listening to what they have to say. Sometimes, it is necessary to connect with your children to help them grow. Otherwise, it is most likely they will act out harshly. Communication is a two-way process; you need to take the initial step for them to listen to what you have to say. You can start by asking, “Do you need anything?” “What’s bothering you?” to get them to speak about it. Communication does not necessarily mean that you always have to listen to them but don’t let them feel dictated.
- Understand their perspective
It is human nature to be curious about certain things, and young children, to be exact, are especially curious about each and everything. Obstinate children often want to learn everything at once, and they may have strong opinions, making it difficult to make them act upon a decided routine. For example, if your fourteen-year-old is throwing a tantrum to sleep early, do not force him to sleep. Instead, ask him why he does not want to sleep early and listen – it is absolutely fine to give a 10-minute relaxation once in a while. Or you can give them options as we mentioned above. You can bribe them to sleep by asking, “Which story do you want to listen to?” or “What would you like to eat for breakfast?”
- Planned Ignorance
Stubbornness can happen at any age, but sometimes it becomes a part of the personality if not managed properly at a young age. The key to effectively discipline a stubborn child is by motivating them to express themselves. Allow them to deal with their stress healthily. Discipline should be a way of teaching and not punishing.
Consequences should be related to the nature of the bad behavior. One effective way to discipline a bad behaving stubborn child is planned ignoring. Paying zero attention to a misbehaving child and giving extra attention when he’s at his best behavior is the key to reward the child. Children like to get the attention of their parents either by misbehaving or by obeying. So, it is best to completely ignore the misbehavior so your stubborn child cannot confuse your attention to his advantage. Show them that their disobedience does not work.
- Be patient
“Parenting is hard, especially trying to be patient with little versions of impatient you.”
Parenting a stubborn child requires an immense amount of patience and focus. It is most likely that your child is acting that way to get your reaction. For example, if he’s tapping a toy on the floor, you decide to ignore, but then the child starts to bang his head instead of the toy, and you react by scolding him politely. Even an irritated sigh can confuse the child. The best method to avoid this confused understanding is to take deep breaths and divert your focus to other things. It will give your stubborn kid zero response, and there are higher chances that he will not do the same thing again. Scolding or shaming a kid can create a negative impression. You should never blame your child for his stubborn act in front of others – they may take this reaction for granted and continue to repeat the same misbehavior.
- Be a Role Model
Children are born with zero knowledge of social skills; they have no idea how to react. They tend to imitate the people they live with. They learn everything from their surrounding environment, so if you have a complaint about your child’s stubbornness, there are higher chances that you are responsible for this behavior. Be consistent with your attitude towards the children.
Setting examples are very crucial as they’ll follow in your footsteps. For example, if you teach your child that he must not use violence and then give him a spanking for his bad behavior, he will get confusing signals. Never give your children false promises to get rid of their stubbornness because eventually, your child will lose trust in you. He will never believe your promises again and will continue his bad behavior.
Stubborn children are not difficult to handle, and by no means are they the easiest kids to parent. But all you need is the right strategy and a lot of patience. And it will work all in your favor! Trust our ingenious ways to help you handle these little mischievous cute creatures.
If you have other effective ways to add up to the provided information or you want to share your parenting stories with us, please use our comments section and spread the word. We would love to hear from you!