Reviving a withering social network or starting fresh in a new community isn’t easy for any busy mom, but the importance of developing social connections can’t be underestimated. Women who feel a balanced sense of connection are healthier and more resilient to stress and anxiety. Take charge of your social life with one small step a day to create a more energizing, fulfilling social life.
- Contact a mother’s group. Ask to attend a meeting as a guest. Put the date on the calendar and schedule a sitter if necessary.
- Call an old friend. Reconnecting can help you rebuild your confidence as you start meeting new moms.
- Email a mom you’d like to get to know better. Arrange a time to meet up with you and your kids for a play date at the park or the mall play area.
- Send a Facebook friend request to a mom you’ve met recently.
- Evaluate your schedule and answer a volunteer request. Want to get to know lots of members fast? Volunteer for a leadership position.
- Meet the family down the street. Bring cookies and head over with your kids to introduce yourselves.
- Kids are great icebreakers. Strike up a conversation with another mom at the park. Just a casual conversation with another adult can boost your spirits.
- Send a card to a friend to let her know you’re thinking about her or call just to chat.
- Join an online moms’ group. Reaching out to other moms online who can relate to your situation can help you feel less isolated.
- Text a friend with a new baby. Remember how hard those first few weeks are? Coordinate a time to stop by with a meal.
- Are your children in school? Invite other classroom moms to a “seasoned moms” lunch.
- Sign up for a fitness class. The exercise will give you energy and boost your mood. The group fitness experience will help you feel a sense of connection to others with similar goals.
- Time for Girls Night Out! You may feel a little tired the next day, but recalling all the laughs is sure to put a spring in your step.
- Does someone in your life zap your energy? (And no, your kids don’t count!) Consciously begin to move away from draining one-sided friendships.
- Beware of overcommitment. Say no to whatever isn’t a priority or doesn’t interest you. You’ll do yourself and your family a favor.
- Make a list of your favorite forgotten past-times.
- Carve out 15 or 20 minutes in your day to pursue one of those hobbies. Check out the latest trends with your hobby on Pinterest or in the blogosphere.
- Start a walking group with a friend or two. Walking and talking for an hour is great exercise and like free therapy!
- Moms know the 4 to 6 p.m.“witching hour” is rough when everyone is tired, hungry and cranky. Invite other moms, whose husbands frequently travel for business or work long hours, for a two-hour afternoon play date and dinner. Order pizza and ask everyone to bring a side dish like a salad, dessert and juice boxes for the kids. Dinner done, kids sleep well, and you get a quiet evening ahead!
- Plan a morning at a local attraction with your kids and invite other moms to join you.
- Check out the library for upcoming talks, book clubs and other activities. Attend a few discussions to meet other people with shared interests.
- Organize a game night or book club with a few women you’d like to get to know better.
- Feel roadblocked by cliquey moms? Reach out to a receptive member of the group. If she is on the PTA/PTO, ask how you can get involved. And, remember many moms aren’t cliquey.
- Schedule a manicure/pedicure morning out with a friend.
- Find a sitter and schedule a date night with your spouse.
- Invite your neighbors for a backyard BBQ. Have outdoor games for the kids.
- Support a friend who sells make-up, jewelry, cookware or candles by accepting an invitation to one of the parties. Go with a budget and enjoy some time hanging out with other women.
- Need a break? Acknowledge when life is getting too busy and take a few hours to do something on your own.
- Spending time with other families is fun, but set aside an afternoon with just you and your kids. Head to the park for a picnic lunch, watch a movie together, play a board game, try something new.
- Regroup with your family around the dinner table. Communication builds stronger families. Talk about your day’s highs and lows, frustrations and successes.
Freelance journalist Christa Melnyk Hines, a mom of two sons, is the author of Confidently Connected: A Mom’s Guide to a Satisfying Social Life.